The little girl sat at the table, her face cupped in her two hands, transfixed by the activities of her grandfather, who was sitting opposite. He was preparing his usual piled-high breakfast concoction, which went something like this:
- The foundation of the structure was usually a pair of shredded wheat biscuits. Fair enough, thinks the little girl, breakfast looks normal so far.
- These were scattered with a coarse brown powder, a mixture of ground-up pumpkin, sesame, linseed and sunflower seeds. What is that stuff, wonders our heroine.
- Added to this was almost always some stewed apple. Not sure I like how this is shaping up, thinks she.
- This was sometimes mixed with spoonfuls of stewed apricots, prunes, or maybe blueberries. Prunes, ewwww. She is starting to feel that there is something very wrong about all of this.
- Slices of banana or pear came next. Not in the same bowl, surely?
- Onto this burgeoning pile went a liberal pour of diet 7-up – a diabetic-friendly replacement for sugar – which would cause the by now mushy-looking contents to froth, fizz and almost escape the confines of the bowl. Euuuuuughhhh! That’s shouldn’t be allowed!
- As the bubbling subsided, the breakfast mish-mash was crowned with a few spoonfuls of natural yoghurt and slurpily devoured. Our heroine is not sure she believes what she has just seen.
At the end of the ritual, the little girl had only one thing to say:
Granda, you’re disgusting!
I don't recommend you try this at home, folks...
Fortunately my niece (who is a little girl no more) was not permanently traumatised by the experience, while my father, her grandfather, persists with this breakfast formula to this day. It’s sandwiched on one side by a swig of cod liver oil straight from the bottle and, on the other, by the ingestion of an assortment of pills and medicaments which seem to be the stock-in-trade of the eldery gent. Even when those pills and such depress his appetite, he still manages this breakfast feat daily and we all still look on and wonder.
Oh, dear. I was more or less with your Dad until I got to the 7-Up part. Not that I would have even eaten it w/o said soda, but at least I was thinking “cereal-type stuff, fiber stuff, fruit stuff,” but 7-Up?! I think I’ll leave this one to your dad!
I agree with Jenni. I was thinking it sounded ok until the 7-Up. The soda just makes it sound revolting! I’m not sure I’ll be trying out this recipe any time soon.
yikes. that breakfast scares me a little bit. but it’s kinda a nice and funny memory :)
Jenni: Oh dear is right, we have been both fascinated and somewhat repulsed by this for years!
Esther: thanks for stopping by and I completely understand why you would not want to try this out – neither would I :)
Heather: probably scared my niece too but definitely funny at the same time :)
As long as he enjoys it, more power to him.
Haha, the photos really illustrate the story well, especially the bubbling! I wonder if she was more afraid of the stewed prunes or the 7-up….
Oh my… That is… unique. Let’s go with unique. I dislike breakfast at the best of times, but if I didn’t already this would have put me off it for life. Have you ever tried this revolting concoction?
So, I’m curious – how does this concoction taste? I’m ok with prunes but that 7-up is something else :)
Great story. Can’t help feeling that after the cod liver oil it’s going to taste fab whatever way you call it. Have you ever tried it? What does it taste like? Is one of the post breakfast pills imodium? Your loyal public need to know!
Hahahahaha,….what a funny post & your grandpa has a speicial tatse!! 7 up!! Hahahahahahaha,…..
The fizzing shredded wheat is fascinating, in a car-wreck sort of way, but the photo next to it looks quite appetizing. No matter – if your dad’s healthy and happy, then maybe he’s on to something. I imagine that no germ, virus or other illness dare strike someone who consumes this, cod liver oil and a small pharmacy every morning!
May I add my own “How can you possibly eat that?” moment, courtesy of my own pater familias? When I was a kid, he poured a little coffee onto his rice, which he then ate with eggs and sausages. Fascinating, in a car-wreck sort of way.
Wow, that dish was something else. My granddad had a different one, which as a kid I wholeheartily adopted – grapnuts topped with vanilla ice cream and honey. Very yummy!
Okay, so you had me until the diet 7-up. Yikes! I have to admit I’m intrigued by that ground seed mixture.
Joie de Vivre: indeed so!
Other Tiger: I think it’s the 7-up that gets everyone :)
Angry Brit: well, up until this morning, I hadn’t tried it, but, to satisfy the curiosity of my readership, I felt that I really should try it out; can I just say that it was indeed, umm, unique…
Natasha: having tried it for the first (and, I very much suspect, last) time this morning, I think I can describe the addition of the 7-up to the mix as definitely constituting an acquired taste…
Rufus: I think you may have a point there with the cod liver oil – almost anything would taste good after a swig of that, even 7-up soaked cereal!
Sophie: it is funny indeed…:)
Tangled Noodle: well, he has assorted ailments which he battles gamely and I do think that any bacteria or virus would think twice when faced with this breakfast every morning – and if that doesn’t get them, the Guinness he consumes will! As for the coffee+rice+eggs+sausage combination, I think that 7-up cereal has met its match, in a car wreck sort of way :)
OysterCulture: Oh I bet we all have curious food combinations tucked away in our backgrounds!
Lori: indeed – that seems to have been a pretty common reaction :) As for the ground seeds, he’s been putting ground up pumpkin seeds on cereal for a long time, while that particular seed mix is one that I introduced my parents to in the past few years, as I use all the time on my cereal – I just don’t have any added 7-up!
Eeh gads, that is wicked! LOL!
I don’t mean to offend your Dad but…that is absolutely vile.
Your dad is so creative! It reminded me another funny anecdote, my brother tried coke as an ingredient of a cake when we first started our culinary experiences together as a child. Do not ask the result. :)
no no no no…I’m scared…….eeeek
This is really so funny! :) It doesn’t sound appetizing, but it’s a funny story regardless.
Too funny! It may be gross but Grandpa created a great memory there!! :)
Brilliant post!
I was A-ok with it all … until the 7-Up. Ack! I’m ok with the yoghurt as well. Save for the soda, I’d say its a right fine breakfast … though I do understand the value of it as sugar replacement.
This surely brought a smile to my face. :)
that takes the cake……but dont tell him it might get mixed in too…..
LOL, I am curious but not sure I am up for that one either :)
noble pig: eeh gads indeed!
aoife mc: I’m sure he wouldn’t take offence, we’ve been telling him that for years!
zerrin: hmm, coke and cake, I won’t ask (though apparently coca cola with ham a la Nigella Lawson is quite a successful combination!)
manuel: now, just imagine if someone asked for this in the restaurant…
Duo Dishes: yes, not appetising at all!
Chef Bliss: it’s a great memory alright :)
Diva: glad I could at least bring a smile to your face with this!
doggybloggy: I wouldn’t put it past him to mix in cake too…
Chef E: well, I won’t be trying it again, that’s for sure :)
Whoa, that just blew my mind a little bit.
I just have to ask…Did the meal actually explode at any point? It seems dangerous! GREG
I was wondering the same thing as Greg. Kind of reminds me of those Mentos + Diet Coke videos I’ve seen. But hey, to each his/her own. As a kid I’m pretty sure I’d have wanted to eat what your grandpa eats for breakfast, but now, although I’m intrigued, I’d definitely have to pass. I love that you slipped in the mention of cod oil, too, and of course the highlighted “Grandpa, you’re disgusting!” was hilarious. This was great!
megan: it’s ok, normal service will resume shortly :)
greg: it hasn’t exploded yet…
Sapuche: indeed, I might have wanted to try something like this as a kid but (having tried it the other day), I think I’ll be passing on this myself!
Like others, I was willing to go along until it got to the diet 7-Up. Hey but if it works, it works. Does he make the pumpkin powder stuff himself or buy it? That sounds really good.
Maggie, the powder is a homemade mix of pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, sesame seeds and linseeds, mixed roughly in the ratio 1:1:1:2 and ground up in a little coffee grinder. It’s a mix I use myself on cereal.
I could be in the wrong, here, but this looks kind of delicious. Something about sprite and bananas intrigues me. I think I’ll feed this to my little brother, Aidan. he eats everything. We call him a Junkatarian
Hmm – I suspect a Junkatarian would probably like this, Will!
I could use the soda right about now…and Greg’s right, did it explode? funny…
I’m actually rather intrigued by this and may give it a go, minus the yoghurt. Bleaugh yoghurt!
Chef E: not quite explosive but close :)
Lottie: thanks for dropping in! the beauty of it (though I don’t know if beauty is quite the right word in this context…) is that you can do it whatever way you like :)
Sibling here. Glad to know that the story of Dad’s breakfast habits is immortalised on the Bog……ooops sorry…. I mean the Blog!
…or glub, which is how Da referred to the blog the other day!